A couple months ago, we were informed that Trump had decided to “approve” the building (manufacturing) of so-called “tiny cars” – which are actually non-compliant cars – in the United States. These are the small, inexpensive cars and small pick-ups and so on that are available in other places, such as Asia and South America where people are free to buy vehicles that meet their needs as opposed to what government demands. Trump said such vehicles can be built in America now, because he said so.

It sounds magical, almost.

So far, none are available – and not one major car company has said they plan to offer them for sale in America anytime soon.

Or ever.

This is probably on account of the fact that while they can be built here (there was never any law forbidding that) they cannot be legally sold here, because they are non-compliant – and Trump has not (with a wage of his magic executive order wand) disappeared the regulations that have to be complied with before any new vehicle may legally be sold in the United States. Sure, they could be built in America. But that is not quite the same thing as being legal for sale in America. What would be the point of building that which cannot (legally) be sold in America, in America?

To ship these non-compliant cars back to Asia, to sell them there?

Trump is a willful ignoramus when it comes to details. He seems to think he can breezily say – make it so, like Captain Picard from Star Trek – and it will be so.

But it ain’t so.

Maybe he just hopes we’ll forget all about it. Like the Epstein stuff. Like those $5,000 rebate checks Americans were supposed to be getting courtesy of Elon Musk and DOGE. Whatever happened to DOGE?

Never mind. It all sounded good in the moment. And then the moment passed. It’s like those 15 minute ecstatic experiences you’re supposed to get when you take a dose of DMT. The problem is you ned to keep getting high to feel the ecstasy.

Back to compliance cars and why we’re not going to get tiny cars that aren’t.

The federal requirement that all new vehicles have driver and front seat air bags, for instance – as well as the de facto requirement that they have side-impact air bags, too (in order to comply with federal side-impact occupant protection standards) – have not been eliminated and therefore must be complied with.

There is also the potentially thorny problem that would arise if Trump waved his magic wand and exempted “tiny cars” from air bag requirements while leaving them in force for all the other cars. This would impose a massive competitive disadvantage on air-bag-equipped vehicles – which is all of the ones  we’ree allowed to buy – and the companies that have to try to sell them. Just like that, it would be much harder to sell them.

There would be immense wailing and gnashing of teeth. The only way to curtail it would be to generally exempt all new vehicles from any federal requirement that any of them have to have air bags. There would also need to be a general amnesty from all of of the other federal “safety” – and “emissions” – regulations that must currently be complied with before any passenger vehicle may legally be offered for sale in this country. Then we’d be able to buy – and drive on public (really, the government’s) roads models such as the Mahindra Roxor as well as side-by-sides such as the Can Am Spyder, too. Plus the plethora of other such vehicles that aren’t yet available but would be, if they could be sold for use on public roads.

The odds of that happening are on par with Americans getting those $5,000 DOGE rebate checks that were – briefly – dangled – in front of them.

Trump, to be fair, probably does not understand any of this. He is not a “car guy.” Much less a guy who has any understanding of the way the regulatory regime operates. I would be willing to bet the title to my Trans-Am that he could not (without the aid of a TelePrompter) explain what “CAFE” stands for, much less when and how it came about. Nor “SRS” – which is the acronym that stands for Supplemental Restrain System, which is “air bags” in federal regulatory-speak.

I doubt he has ever heard of “FMVSS” – Federal Motor Vehicle Safety Standards. These are the litany of regulations that must be complied with by every new vehicle before it may legally be offered for sale in the United States.

“Tiny cars” don’t comply with many FMVSS standards – not just those pertaining to air bags. Making them compliant would, in most cases, entail a complete makeover. More finely, it would entail making them like the compliance cars that are already on the market; i.e., the cars we’re allowed to buy. They would have driver and front seat passenger as well as side-impact air bags. Also back-up cameras. They would need to be compliant with roof-crush standards, too. End result? They’d no longer be as tiny – and they’d be much heavier and also much more expensive.

We already have such cars.

They are the compliant cars.

 . . .

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