NSA Agents Horrified People Spying On Their Personal Conversations

babylonbee.com

FORT MEADE, MD — A group of federal employees expressed feelings of shock and outrage over blatant violations of their privacy, as NSA agents were horrified to learn that people had spied on their personal conversations.

Members of the National Security Agency said they were appalled to learn that their private conversations with each other had been subject to review without their knowledge, leaving them dismayed that their rights to privacy had been infringed.

"This is a blatant violation of our privacy," said NSA agent Stefanie Gilbert. "We had those conversations with each other under the assumption that we could speak confidentially and not worry about anyone spying on us. It's really uncomfortable to know that there are people out there looking into our private messages to each other. It just feels… wrong."

An investigation revealed chat room messages from NSA employees covering a wide range of controversial and explicit topics. The messages were made public upon their discovery, setting off a public relations firestorm and leaving the employees alleging a betrayal of trust.

"It's awful feeling like everything you do or say will be watched or listened to," said NSA agent Brian Dean. "Nobody should have to worry about having their private messages read by someone they didn't intend to have access to them. That's not privacy. That's not American."

At publishing time, NSA agents were also in an uproar over rumors that their online browsing histories had been tracked and stored in offshore data centers for scrutiny by unauthorized parties.

Purchasing congresspeople has never been easier for lobbyists!