Once upon a time, young adults could leave the house and disappear. Not disappear as in end up on the back of a carton of milk, another relic of a bygone era, but disappear from the watchful eyes of their parents. Then cellphones became ubiquitous, dampening the ability to do ridiculous things without repercussion, at least not immediate repercussion. With smartphones and tracking apps, though, the game is over. Big Brother is watching you, only this time it’s in the form of mom and dad.

It’s not all parents, only 52 percent, according to a new poll from Mott — a children’s hospital that conducts polling on children’s health. The other 48 percent of parents are cool. For the 52 percent, though, they are keeping tabs on their precious kiddos at all times.

Forget skipping school, the apps know. Likewise, if a kid speeds a little or heads to a neighboring town for its music venue or goes to Whataburger at 3 a.m. When Benjamin Franklin said, “Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety,” he was actually talking about an argument over taxes between the Pennsylvania General Assembly and the Penn family, not tracking apps. But that’s no reason not to appropriate the sentiment for modern times.

Because tracking kids is wrong. I know, I’ve been a tracker, but I gave it up and never looked back. My kids, though, continue to track one another. Their mom tracks them. They track her. Friends track one another. Everyone is involved in everyone else’s business. And, admittedly, at times it’s useful. For example, my 16-year-old wasn’t given her requested days off for the Cromwell family reunion. She decided to make the three-hour drive after her shift ended sometime after 10 p.m.

Her mom was against this. Her grandparents were against this. I was mildly concerned, but I’m given to a bit of oppositional defiance, so I decided she was definitely making the drive. Did I have her sisters pull up her location a few times to ensure she was safely progressing in our direction? Totally. In that scenario — a 16-year-old traversing a major interstate before heading onto rural deer-infested roads — a little tracking made sense, particularly as she didn’t arrive until almost 2 a.m.

But that’s not what’s going on for most, particularly as the Mott data is about tracking young people ages 18 to 25, a group that used to be known as “adults.” Outside of specific situations such as the aforementioned road trip, no one needs to know what their offspring are up to on such a granular level. When I was that age, my parents didn’t even necessarily know what state I was in, literally or figuratively. Things were simpler then. 

I do have an 18-year-old, though, one who is heading out of state for college. As a caring father, shouldn’t I want to know if she’s on campus or somewhere else? No, and not just because I don’t know anything about the local geography of the state to which she’s moving other than it mostly consists of land and not much else.

I know this is radical, but I trust her enough to go camping without a homing signal. Even if I did know, that information wouldn’t tell me anything useful, such as “she’s being stalked by a moose.” And if it did tell me that, the moose would definitely be faster than the plane ride it would take me to get to her.

Because by constantly monitoring the situation, we’re not just giving up essential liberty for a little temporary safety, we’re raising kids to think the surveillance state is normal. I mean, it is, but that doesn’t mean we should give into it and blindly accept it. It’s not right that our pocket computers are relaying information about our driving habits to our insurance companies. We shouldn’t normalize being spied on by our televisions even if too many consumers view 1984 as a guidebook and not a cautionary tale.

I get it. I’ve got three daughters, three precious angels who I want to keep safe. Tracking them doesn’t keep them safe, though, it just infringes on their ability to grow up. Because a kidnapper isn’t going to let a victim broadcast her location. A runaway is going to delete the app. A young adult who really wants to go away for the weekend without mom and dad knowing is going to use a GPS spoofing app.

And we should encourage that. Not the kidnapping, but the subterfuge. It shows independence and problem-solving skills. That still doesn’t justify the tracking, though, so just stop it. They may always be our babies, no matter how old they get, but they’re not our free-range prisoners.

Rich Cromwell is a writer living in Northwest Arkansas. He produces the Cookin' Up a Story podcast, which you can listen to here. You can also follow him on X.