The DoorDash Debate means America is actually finally DOOMED

Begun the DoorDash Wars have.

I have spent a lot of time on Twitter lately, not X because that’s a stupid name, valiantly wielding the sword of truth and expletives against those yutes and zoomers who claim that they are forced by the economy to have all their meals delivered.

I get into a ton of debates and a lot of people accuse me of misrepresenting the other side, so I thought to documents some of the crazy crap out there so that I can fling into my interlocutors’ faces later.

Now there’s some caveats – I definitely agree with those who merely say that things are more expensive than they were in the past. Of course they are, and there’s a lot of reasons for that. It would be silly to claim otherwise.

What I am arguing against is something completely different. And that’s the claim that the economy is so bad that people might as well order delivery because they can never buy a home. A corollary to this is that cooking at home is no longer reasonable because groceries are so example.

These claims are so idiotic that they should be ridiculed by all people of good faith and humour.

So here are some examples of morons actually claiming these things, in case people don’t want to believe me that they’re doing so.

These are all in response to the following meme, which a response to the comparison of a fast food burger to a burger cooked at home. I have included both below:

I mean, I should hope that most people are smart enough to know how stupid the response is, but if you don’t here are even worse arguments about eating at home versus ordering out.

(1) Morons who argue there’s no price difference between the two. 

“I had a boomer who tried to tell me to just cook at home. There’s barely a difference. It’s as if they won’t understand unless we walk into their house and swipe the food off their tables,” this user only had 29 followers.

This idiot argued that it would cost $45.43 to make the meal at home. 756 followers.

“Bro the cook at home to save era is officially dead. Now I’m paying $25 for sad ground beef and buns just to feel poor twice. Fast food won. Pass the $15 combo and some copium please,” said a pathetic loser with 666 (!) followers.

“Round the Las Vegas area, ground beef ranges from 6.99 a pound for the 80:20 to 9.99 or 10.99 for the 93:7. Only slightly cheaper than fast food. If this crisis continues, as it surely will, many more people are going to be homeless and they’ll demand people starve in silence,” said one guy with 1.1K followers.

“Meat 8 bucks Buns 4 bucks Heinz 5 bucks Fries 3 bucks Lettuce 1 dollar Tomato 1 dollar Cheddar 3 dollar Onion 1 dollar Total 26 dollars but that makes 2 burgers so 13 bucks a piece. The combo deal is only 2 dollars extra and it comes with a drink so it’s cheaper,” says a dunce with 157 followers.

(2) They just make one dish and throw the rest of the ingredients away. 

“That ground beef on the left is easily $12. Lettuce $2. Fries $7. Buns $4. Cheese $6. Ketchup $4. Tomatoes $3. Onion $2. So yeah burger at home (don’t forget the charcoal too!) is gonna run you over $40. Slightly less if you already have condiments a some cheese,” this user had 62 followers.

I mean, unbelievably stupid.

“No way you are getting that pound of meat for less than $5. Unless it’s not meat,” user with 1.4K followers.

“I would like to know what store has all those ingredients for five dollars,” user with 1.4k followers.

“True it doesn’t work in 2026; tomatoes are nearly $5 other toppings and sauces are nearly each $5. buying bread may be $3.5; but buying a small piece of meat nah $10-30,” another moron with 37 followers.

“Even 15-20 years ago you couldn’t buy all that shit for $5,” said this idiot with 1.5K followers.

This idiot apparently buys ketchup every time there’s a hamburger and then throws it away:

“Ground beef alone is over 6-7 dollars lol the frozen fries are another 7-8 dollars and ketchup if you don’t already have it is like $5 and don’t get me wrong it’s definitely cheaper to eat at home but the price comparison is so off on this post,” said the moron.

“On what planet can you get all those groceries for $5.43?!? Do they mean it costs that much a serving? How many servings are there? I have SO many questions,” said an idiot who has never cooked at home in their entire life apparently.

“All of that for the homemade burgers costs at least $30,” Kellie is a Christian mom with 13k followers and only eats “real food” but doesn’t know how to cook at home.

“That wouldn’t even cover half the ground beef,” said one idiot who thinks the beef in one hamburger is $10. Amazing.

“Shit that cheese alone is like 7 bucks the pound of beef 9 the fries 6 the ketchup 7 the head of lettuce 2 the onion maybe 1 same for tomato and 3 for the buns,” from another author. Do authors not cook? 876 followers.

I have to think that most of these people are just pretending not to understand how food preparation works because they don’t want to admit that they’re spending money out of laziness. But some of this is actually animated by people too stupid to know how cooking works.

And that is depressing.

I added the follower count because some people believe the worst offenders are bots. Ultimately it doesn’t matter, a good argument doesn’t need a follower count. BUT, I do notice that a lot of the dumber comments are from low follower accounts.

Make of that what you will.

There’s a lot of people making the right observation, which is it’s always cheaper to cook at home it just takes effort and planning ahead:

Order a burger combo through Door Dash; it becomes a $25 nightmare and you’ve still not tipped the driver the $5 they deserve for you having convenience. It amazes me how many people can’t get up 15 minutes earlier to make their own lunch to take with them to save $25 a day.

Yep.