McGruff The Crime Dog Goes Undercover In Furry Terrorist Cell

babylonbee.com

U.S. — As federal authorities launched investigations into alleged left-wing extremist groups in the wake of acts of political violence, sources revealed that McGruff the Crime Dog had been enlisted to go undercover in a furry terrorist cell.

According to one insider, the Federal Bureau of Investigation contacted McGruff late last week to ask him to lend his services to a new operation to infiltrate a radical group of furries suspected of plotting acts of terror to be carried out within the United States.

"He has skills and experience that are unmatched in this type of investigation. Also, he looks remarkably like a furry," the source said. "Once the bureau learned that an organized group of radical, left-wing furries was planning terrorist attacks, everyone immediately knew that McGruff was the dog they needed for this hunt."

In a transcript of a secret recording made by McGruff at one meeting, radical furries could be heard discussing an upcoming plot:

McGruff: How do you do, fellow terrorist furries?

Terrorist Furry #1: Hey, welcome to the group. So, anyway, how's the planning going with that thing, Phil?"

Terrorist Furry #2 (believed to be "Phil"): Ruff…

The source was unable to confirm the nature of the plot, but revealed that the FBI was on the case. "We couldn't have gotten this far without McGruff," the insider continued. "He has a nose for this type of thing."

At publishing time, McGruff declined to comment on the report, only confirming that he was willing to help federal law enforcement by doing whatever was necessary to take a bite out of crime.

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